Finally, something smooth!!!

Wow!!!  Go USCIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  We went in this morning for our fingerprinting (even though our appointment was for the 30th).

They open at 8am and we got there around 8:20, parked in a munimeter spot 1 block away (which is pretty much a miracle down there!), and we were done and out by 8:40.  The longest part of the process was waiting in the security line to enter the building.

best.government.office.ever!  Way better than the NYC offices like 1PP and the county clerk!

Staff were courteous, polite, and spoke english fluently, and the building/process was not crowded or backed up at all. It was so great that Ababa and I actually both took the time to fill out and hand in the comment cards!

So, YAY!!!!  Hopefully our I-171H is being processed as I post this and it will arrive in the mail soon (we're out of town next week so hoping we have a great suprise when we get back in town) then Ababa can do the last step of certification on 3/21!

Today I am calling with a few questions for our agency, namely is it ok that on my notarized medical form(which is a huge pain in the rear to get done b/c we have to bring a traveling notary to the Dr and this is the second time we've had to do it b/c our new agency requires a different medical form that our first agency) my Dr wrote that she just met me and had no idea if my immunizations were current (despite the fact that I've been her patient for 4 years, just saw her in Nov, and a year ago she did all my immunizations for grad school-including getting my vaccine records and administering a blood test for MMR antibodies that resulted in me having to get another MMR booster--all of which is documented in my chart which she clearly did not read while filling out this form...I wish I could find a Dr that I like in NYC)! Let's hope the form is still ok!!!!!

But, all groaning aside, if our medical forms are acceptable, there will be 1 day of Ababa running around city and state offices to get our dossier certified when our I-171H arrives and then we can send our dossier through the authentication process in DC and to Ethiopia!!!!  And then our paperchase will be done for now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We are praying that our dossier is in ET by 3/28!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that our agency has been diligent about B's paperchase even with all the recent changes in regulations and that his paperwork will be ready to be submitted to court!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One step closer to sweet baby-B (who is really starting to look like an adorable big boy in his photos:-)

On the have my cake and eat it too front-there was a clear reason why I was freaked and it's b/c my spidey sense told me that the proposed situation was no good. Well, it all became clear this weekend and I am so glad that it did!  So, we'll see what other interesting opportunities are out there or if I should focus on making the "cake" I have more palatable!

FINGERPRINTING!!!

Guess who is going to try to crash the local USCIS office tomorrow morning to try and get our prints done early?!?!?!?!  Yep, mama, ababa, and..., well not woosha, but we could get a paw print for solidarity:-)

Here's hoping that USCIS is not backed-up tomorrow morning and we can be in and out!

B's Quilt

Well, there's all kinds of drama going on with court dates/MOWA letters right now all of which could delay our court date, plus we are still waiting for our fingerprinting appointment from USCIS (we are going to start phone stalking them on Monday to see what is going on), so we figured we'd post about B's quilt instead:-) Plus we got 4 new pics of him today, showing off a sassy personality, grinning from ear to ear, and wearing a cheerful yellow shirt with a dinosaur!

We've bought a lot of necessary items for B, mostly from craigslist, ebay, half.com, and other discount places (though I do have a soft spot for Amazon sales, especially since I now have Amazon prime:-) We got an awesome crib for B that converts to a toddler bed since he still sleeps in a crib at the transition home, but he'll probably be close to 3 by the time he comes home...and we hope that B will have younger siblings at some point down the road so it should get more use as a crib then...the crib has some scratches on the dark wood that Ababa is going to cover-up with some non-toxic stain, but we got it for about 1/3 the retail price, so we're not complaining:-)

Here's B's crib/bed it's the Babyletto Mercer:

So, we wanted to get something special for him, something new, something custom made just for B, and something that would fit in the mod vibe we decided to go with in his room.  I had fallen in love with Tanneicasey on Etsy's windowpane quilts right after we got married and decided I wanted to get one for our future child.  I also fell in love with the Michael Miller Zoology fabric. So, I was thrilled that Tannei could work with me to incorporate fabrics that we really wanted for B's room.  I picked all the fabrics in the quilt except for one that she picked. She did the layout, picked which fabric to use for the edging, and had the genius idea to do the backing in dark grey.  The first quilt she made had some of the same fabric squares next to each other which looked a little out of whack.  She realized this before posting it for our purchase and emailed us offering to make another one. Usually we would have just chalked it up to being homemade and bought the first one, but we wanted this quilt to be really special for B.

And WOW is it!  We love this quilt and can't wait for B to wrap himself up in it!  It looks awesome in his room.  Reversing it gives a completely different look and a special inset tag on the back with his whole name embroidered on it makes it so special.  I hope that we'll get to spend many many years snuggled up with B under this blanket--reading books, talking, laughing, cuddling, and loving our son!!!

So, here are some more pics--most of the fabrics are by Michael Miller.  In a few weeks, or maybe months, we'll post pics of his whole room.  It's starting to come together and look really cute!!!

Hmmm...blogger seems to be not dealing with pics very well.  here's a link to the Etsy posting if that works better: B's quilt:

IT'S A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!

FINALLY, WE CAN SHARE OUR BIG NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We are delighted and overjoyed to share that we decided to switch agencies and on February 10 we officially received and accepted the referral of a two year old waiting child with whom we are already head over heels in love.  We first saw his precious face on December 16th and, after much prayer and consideration, we were unofficially matched with him January 6th (we couldn't officially accept his referral until our homestudy was done--and what an ordeal getting our homestudy done was!)

We can't post his picture or Ethiopian name on our blog until we have legally adopted him, and we are still not sure if we will share his first name (American or Ethiopian) online, so here at mamaababandwoosha we will call him B.

B for:

Sweet Baby Boy
Bereket (an Ethiopian name meaning "blessing")
Brown Sugar (the color of his adorable face)
Lil'Bit (he's tiny--but growing quickly!)
Beloved (which he is already more than we can express!!!!!)

So, take your pick as to what wonderful word or phrase you think B represents...we think they are all great, just like him:-)

We were hoping that it might work out through some unusual but potentially feasible circumstances to adopt Aang at the same as B, but we learned today that is not to be, so we decided to share our wonderful news with you.  We'll finish the story of Aang and why we switched agencies (as they are closely related) another day, but that is not the story for today.

Today is a joyous happy day and it is B's day!!!!

We'll go back and fill-in the blanks of our path to accepting B's referral in the next few days.  Right now, the biggest wait is that we filed our I-600A on Valentine's Day, got confirmation of USCIS's receipt, and are just waiting for our fingerprinting appointment so that we can get fingerprinted and have our I-171H issued.  The rest of our dossier is ready to go the second that I-171H shows up in our mailbox!

There have been some changes in the Ethiopian court process this week that could really slow things down, so we are praying fervently that we can pass court before the closure this summer!

Sweet baby B, we are coming to you as fast as we can!!!! We love you so much already and can't wait to meet you! Love, Mama and Ababa (and Woosha)

(The picture is the quilt we had made for B.  We'll do a whole post on it later as we think it is awesome.  We had it custom made by an incredible vendor on Etsy.com and we are using some of the prints to make accents for his room too.)

Have my cake and eat it too...?

Ever want to have your cake and eat it too?  I always want that.  but you know what...this week I may be finding myself in that situation and I am scared...why?!?!?!

I am afraid of the change in a big aspect of my life, of going from super structured to super unstructured, of going from a sure thing to something less certain, of having the possibility of having my cake and eating it too or having the possibility of ending up hungry with no cake...

Yeah, it might not work out, but if it does...WOW... how would that be?!?!?! To have some flexibility in my life, freedom to pursue other dreams and goals while still providing what my family needs, the ability to take care of myself and my family, to have time to pray and think and live a life that is bigger than the box I feel stuck in now.  How would that be?

It's exciting, and scary, and uncertain, and kind of mindblowing.

So, we'll see. 

We're praying and considering all the options and asking God to show us the path he has for us...

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

P.S. Congrats to all the IAN families who are traveling for court soon!!!

P. P.S. Am I the only one who thinks candy hearts are gross? I'd rather red hot hearts, or my all-time fave (but not as lovey-dovey of a candy) the elusive. but amazing gummy CINNAMON BEARS.

We're back:-) and some thoughts on children and families...

I know the suspense is killing you, but our BIG NEWS will have to wait a few more weeks...

Now that we have that out of the way, let's get this blog back up and running again:-)

Throughout this adoption process we've thought a lot about children and birth families and adoptive families and the process of adoption.  In the past few weeks we've thought even longer and harder about these issues as Ethiopian adoption is encountering increasing scrutiny from the Ethiopian government and the US Embassy.   I'm sure we'll do more in-depth posts about each of these thoughts, but for today here's a summary of where we are (I know some of these statements are kind of inflammatory, we'll provide more explanation of why we feel this way in the in-depth posts)...so you'll have to stop back and read those:-) 

1. The process of adoption is to provide children who do not have families that can take care for them with new families who will unconditionally love them and care for them.

2. International adoption where a family in the developed world is adopting a child who was born into a family in the developing world is fraught with inequalities, ethical dilemmas, and challenges.  These arise not only in the circumstances of the birth and adoptive families, but also in the entire adoptive process.

3. Because of these inequalities and challenges it is imperative that families, agencies, and governments of developed countries who are engaging in international adoption go over and above to ensure the process is unfolding in an ethical way.  Right now Ethiopia and the US are trying to figure out the best way to do this on a governmental/legal level, but adoptive families and agencies play a critical role in this process.  Prospective adoptive parents should base their adoption choices on what will best help ensure ethical and transparent adoption practices and the adoption of a child who does not currently have a family who is able to take care of them. Even in seemly mundane tasks as choosing a country, agency, or setting parameters of a child they want to adopt, prospective adoptive parents must recognize the power of their decisions in shaping a child's future and a country's adoptive process, and make decisions as good parents and responsible global citizens.

4. Adoption is not a solution to help a developed country.  It occurs on too small a scale to make a dent in the needs of children in the developing world and, even if it were, it would not typically be in the best long-term interest of a country to allow adoption of an entire generation(s) of children! Adoption can have a profound and lasting impact in the life of an individual child and we fully support adoption (obviously:-), but we as adoptive families should also actively seek profound and lasting positive impact in our child's birth country and in developing countries around the world.


Throughout all these discussions of adoption, birth families, adoptive families, birth countries, adoptive countries...here is the deep an abiding truth.  Children do not "belong" to anyone.  They are unique, individual beings, created by God, loved by God, and eternally parented by God.  Birth parents, adoptive parents, birth countries, adoptive countries...they are all very important and have a special role in loving, caring for, and helping to shape a child, but they are not of the ultimate importance. They are bright and vibrant and important threads in a child's tapestry of life, but they are not the tapestry itself...

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let our bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

from Kahlil Gibran – a Lebanese poet