WAITING CHILD WEDNESDAY

It's been a while, but I just realized today is Wednesday! As always, do your own due diligence re agency, country, child's case, etc...

Jonah-Adorable 2 year old boy in China. Developmentally seems to be on target but is living with hydrocephaleous and brain dysplasia

En-18 month old boy in China who is post-op from heart disease.

Chen-7 month old boy in China living with cleft lip, cleft palate, and heart disease

Pei-18 month old girl living with club feet and spinal cord issues

American World Adoptions has several older children (including a newly listed 7 year old boy)

Brothers 5, 3, and 2 in California living with "mild FAS and mild Cerebral Palsy"-how fun would they be?

The thought that there are children waiting for families and families waiting for children, both stuck in limbo, both waiting, is one of the most heartbreaking travesties of international adoption for me.

If you are waiting to adopt, please consider a waiting child!

I know that many people feel called to internationally adopt a healthy, infant girl but please examine your heart and your calling.  Consider these children waiting for families.  They are ready.  They are real.  They need a family!

No waiting for referral, no waiting for "paper readiness", no knowing that hundreds of other families also wanted to adopt your child and would eagerly parent the next child matching those parameters...adopting a waiting child has some wonderful "process-related" benefits, in addition to the immeasurable joy of becoming parents to a precious child.

Could one of the children posted about here, or the thousands of other waiting children internationally and in foster care, be yours?

Oh, and these incredible sisters have a family who is considering if they might be their family.  Please pray that it would all work out (or if maybe you are their family).

Effective International Aid?

I thought that this was a really interesting article, and one that I agree with in many ways, so I wanted to pass it along.

7 Worst International Aid Ideas

Although I appreciate the sentiment of Toms Shoes, I personally can't justify the cost and would rather buy less expensive shoes and donate the difference to organizations that I can hold accountable and can use their money to both provide for people's needs and stimulate the local economy. (Full disclosure, although I have several friends who love Toms shoes, I don't own any and never have--I am not such a fan of how they look--so if they are the world's most amazing shoes to wear, I don't know that:-)

Before we went to Addis, I had read many blogs re what to pack, had my geeked out spreadsheets of packing info, and felt ready and informed about what was and wasn't available in Addis.  Included in our suitcases were donations for our son's orphanage and care center, namely formula, disposable diapers, cloth diapers, and shoes.  All the blogs I read and people I spoke with said, "you can't get diapers or formula in Addis" "the kids all need shoes and shoes there aren't made well"...blah, blah, blah...

Well...you know what...I think it would have been smarter to avoid any extra baggage fees and only take specialized items that absolutely can't be purchased in Addis like:

-Childrens Benadryl
-high quality hypoallergenic formula like Nutramigen and maybe quality regular formula--check first with the orphanage re what formula they are using as many are quite specific (we took 8 of the giant 40oz tubs of Target formula as it's supposedly the same formulation as the Enfamil formula our care center used)
-new, high-quality cloth diapers and covers IF you know the orphanage/care center will use them

and then I would have used the money I would have spent on extra baggage fees or buying items in the US to buy diapers and shoes and food for the orphanage while in Ethiopia.  Shoes are readily available new or used, basic shoes like crocs are very inexpensive and can be found anywhere. Disposable diapers are easy to find and not that much more expensive than in the US.  The quality is not quite as good, but they are serviceable (just bring some good ones for your kid(s) on the flight home b/c that does make a big difference when you are on a plane!):-)  This way, you can buy more quantity, support the local economy, and talk to the orphanage first to make sure that they need what you are buying.

The donations we brought were much appreciated and I'm sure went to good use, but I think that the above strategy would have been more effective, more wide reaching, and would also have had the impact of helping the local economy.  It's really true that you can buy almost anything in Addis.  It may not be quite the same quality as you are used to at home and the price may be as much as in the US (which is really expensive in Addis) or even a little more, but you can find it (except Benadryl, bring that with you for sure!  Childrens Claritin syrup is readily available, but multiple doctors and pharmacists told us that neither Benadryl  nor epipens were available--scary news for a mama who is allergic to bees and a B who we learned the hard way in Ethiopia was allergic to eggs!).

So, I guess today's ramble is a support of the"buy local"philosophy.

***On a totally unrelated note, I am reading Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali and it is incredibly moving, fascinating, and eye opening.***  

1 month ago we arrived home!

Okay, so this post is a little late:-)  But I just wanted to say 1 month ago on Friday (the 21st) we arrived at JFK.  Sick (me), tired EXHAUSTED (me), giddy with excitement (B), overwhelmed with happiness to be together again (Ababa)...home!

 

B enjoying his 5 hour layover in Frankfurt while I laid across three chairs, burning up with a 103 degree fever and trying very hard not to vomit or fall asleep (either of which would have left my 2 year old roaming on his own through the airport).  He loved the layover...and the flights...and customs...and the wait for Ababa who was stuck in traffic jam from an accident...and the car ride home...me, not so much:-).  I am so glad to be home!

It feels like an eternity since we got back.  In New York City it feels like you are living 3 lives at once, at least that's how it feels for me.  I work full-time at a very intense (unnecessarily so) fast-paced company, am a full-time hands-on mom in the morning and at night--bottle, breakfast, dinner, bath, stories, snuggles, etc., and am gearing up to start my MBA program again in January, and navigating the health insurance/readoption/name change insanity that greets newly adoptive parents when they arrive in the U.S.  I surf the web with three windows open at the same time, skimming back and forth from page to page, talk on the phone while typing, while sorting through/reading papers on my desk.

In Ethiopia it was me and B, and for the first two months Ababa.  We got up, snuggled, had a bottle, ate oatmeal, played and read stories, snuggled some more, walked to a restaurant for lunch, read more stories, had more snuggles, napped together, walked to a restaurant for dinner, read more stories, had more snuggles, took a bath, went to bed together...rinse and repeat...for three months.  Occasionally we would take a cab or minibus somewhere, have an activity like going to the Lion Zoo or Entoto Mountain or a market, or a day trip further afield to Bethel Womens Center, Desta Mender, or Debre Zeit, but almost every day we were just chilling at the Weygoss, usually cocooned in our room.  We met some awesome people and I am grateful to have been able to stay in Addis for so long, but it was long, and hard, and boring, and stressful b/c we had no idea when we would get home and couldn't plan any trips as everyday there was something that "might happen" that kept us in Addis; however, life in NYC was kind of a shock after those three months in Addis with our much slower 24/7 together lifestyle.

Honestly, it feels like we have been home way longer than we were in Ethiopia, even though we were in Ethiopia for 3 long months.  In fact, Ethiopia is quickly fading from my present thoughts.  Although in some ways it is easier this way, I don't want to forget.  In fact, I want to learn more.  I want my eyes to be opened to the beauty and suffering and reality of life in Africa, and to pray for healing; restoration; practical, sustainable solutions for economic and social issues, and above all for transformation of people's hearts and souls.

I have no idea what that looks like or how I am supposed to be part of it.  For now, we are sponsoring a beautiful little girl in Ethiopia and a gorgeous little baby in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (the atrocities that have happened there/are happening there that are rarely, if ever, mentioned in the US mainstream media are horrifying)!  We believe that the organizations we are sponsoring these children through are operating ethically; are fiscally responsible; and are working for effective, culturally informed and sensitive solutions to big problems.  But sponsoring 2 children is not where we feel this ends for us.

Although my immediate thoughts are no longer in Ethiopia all the time, I will never be the same as I was before I went.  I saw suffering, poverty, strength, and hope in orders of magnitude that I never thought possible.  I see depths of loss, and confusion, and love, and strength in my son's eyes that I didn't know were possible.  And I know that as small as I try to make Him, my God is so much bigger than I could possibly imagine.

He loves the old women who carry unimaginably heavy loads of wood down Entoto Mountain, and the legless beggars crawling on their hands on Bole Road, and the leprous weaver with no hands at ALERT, and the teenage street kid huffing glue in Meskel Square, and the man who pees openly in the water cistern on the side of a busy road, and the widow with three young children who silently sits on the rocky side of the road and holds out her hands....He loves them all, he knows their thoughts, their hopes and dreams, their pain, their hurts...just as much as he knows mine...just as much as he knows the "richest" king or the most "powerful" investment banker/corporate chairman/politician.  That is the deepest and most important thing that Ethiopia taught me.  We all have the same value in God's eyes.  We are all made in His image.  No amount of money, or power, or social status, or good health can change that...how amazing, and humbling, and mindboggling is that?!?!?  All this stuff that we spent 24/7 chasing (money, power, success, health...), doesn't really matter at all.  In the long-run, it does not increase our value in God's eyes one tiny bit, and all these things that we find truly horrifying (poverty, sickness, weakness, powerlessness...), they don't devalue us one iota in God's eyes.  How is that possible?  I don't know, and I don't understand, and it stretches my mind, but I do believe that is true!

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. I John 3:1-2

I don't know where our lives will go next or what the future holds for our family.  But I know that God has an amazing plan for our lives, a plan to use us in some tiny way in his amazing plan of redemption.  For now, we are in NYC.  This is where we believe we are supposed to be...for now...This is the family we are meant to have...for now...and we are trying to trust that God will lead us where he wants us.

Who knows what another month could bring...or a year...or five years...or fifty years...

Truthfully, despite this long-winded post, right now, I am just happy that I got some pictures from our trip into an album:-)  Although we only took photos on our crappy cell phones (and downloaded some from our awesome friend L who is a good mom and actually brought a CAMERA on her extended stay in Ethiopia, imagine that:-), I put together an album last night on mypublisher.  I can't wait for it to get here.  It captures most of our highlights from the trip.  I wish I had taken better pictures, that my giggly, adorable son, didn't plaster a look that would put an undertaker to shame on his face when he hears a camera shutter click (while proudly and earnestly saying "Mommy, I smile"), and that I had included some pictures of souvenirs/crafts/markets, and that I had taken pics of the Mercado and the Weavers Market and the awesome, giant fruit stand on the way to church and at the NGO bazar...etc.  But you know what, mostly I am just glad that I put the photos in an album and that we have it for B and for our family:-)  

Internet and Phone in Addis

Practical Travel Info: Internet and Phone

Internet-The Weygoss charges 30 birr per hour for wireless internet and 75 cents Birr for using their computer for internet.  The internet is very slow, went out frequently, and was entirely unavailable for over 2 weeks during our stay.  We ended up inheriting a mobile hotspot (EVDO stick) from a family who was leaving and our internet experience was MUCH better.  I would HIGHLY recommend buying a hotspot if you will be in ET longer than a month.  You can buy them in ET for about $150 US and then have to pay a monthly fee and buy the phone cards to load Birr onto your account, or you can look into options in the US that might work here.

Phone-We brought a global phone (thank you A-M!) and then just had to buy a SIM card here (approx. $30 US I think).  We got ours at a phone kiosk in the lobby of the Getu building.  You can also buy phones here for a reasonable amount ($30-$50 US often).  You then need to buy Birr to load onto your phone and internet stick, we got the green cards which come in 100 Birr denominations.

We only used our phone for making local calls and for incoming local calls, all other calls we did through skype.  Once we started using the EVDO stick skype was great.  The regular Weygoss internet often dropped skype calls.

There are also internet cafes throughout Addis.

Transportation in Addis

Practical Travel Info: Transportation in Addis

There are several transportation options in Addis.  We chose the Weygoss b/c we could walk to a lot of places and are glad we did.  There are also buses, mini buses, taxis, and hiring private drivers. I think that you would need to be clinically insane to try and rent a car in Addis.  It is expensive, and the driving is crazy.  Meskel Square literally has like 27 lanes of traffic that come together with NO TRAFFIC LIGHT (not in a round about, it’s like a K-shaped intersection) and occasionally donkeys or sheep walk across it—‘nough said!

Walking: If you can choke down the smog that flows from vehicles in Addis like water and if you are savvy enough to avoid pickpockets and can deal with beggars, walking is a great option.  Violent crime is very low in Addis and we never felt unsafe in that way at all (remember we are somewhat grizzled New Yorkers thoughJ)  The pickpockets are annoying, but pretty easy to avoid if you know what to look for (kids with boxes who are trying to “sell something” and group of kids with nothing to do are the main culprits—kids shining shoes, selling books or maps,  or selling lottery tickets are not usually an issue beyond heckling you to buy something).  Beggars range from annoying to absolutely heartbreaking.  Make up your mid before you go outside if you want to give them money or not.  We found the best options were to fold 1, 5, or 10 birr into a very small shape and drop on their lap surreptitiously or to put it in a bag of food.  If you are obvious that you are giving money to a beggar, many more will pursue you.  Walking is great, and was often our preferred method of transport for trips of approx. 1 mile or less.  If you have asthma like me, bring your inhalers!  Between the smog and the elevation it can be tough going sometimes.

(For the first few weeks, and always for longer distances, I would carry B in the Boba carrier.  I think any stroller except maybe big rugged jogging strollers with thorn resistant innertube tires would be pretty much useless here.  If you have two little kids and it’s just you, maybe try carrying one on your front and one on your back, or possibly bring a Bob Revolution or Baby Jogger and see if they can work.  We saw several people with McClarens and pretty much laughed at them, as they carried the stroller more than they pushed it!).

Buses: Do not take the red/orange city buses if you can help it.  There is a lot of petty crime on them and farengi (foreigners) are not usually treated well.

MiniBuses: The blue and white mini busses are AWESOME!  The fare is approx. 2.60 Birr to anywhere the bus you are on goes (no free transfers, so if you change busses you have to pay a new fare).  The drivers don’t often speak much English, but you can usually communicate the route you want.  We often used the Bole Road (runs down Bole away from Meskel Square), Mexico Square, and Mekanissa (this was the route to the International Evangelical Church) busses.  They are cheap, relatively fast, and come frequently.  The biggest drawback is that they can be CROWED (think 16+ people in an 11 passenger van with several people also carrying children).  When you want to get off tell the operator “gurage” (sounds like garage but with a “u”).  There is often at least one passenger who speaks English, so if the operator doesn’t know where you want to go see if any of your fellow passengers can understand you.

Cabs-Taxis are everywhere.  They can be yellow or blue and white.  Our area of Bole Road had mostly Blue and white cabs.  Negotiate a price with a driver before you get in and know landmarks near where you want to go as drivers often won’t know where exactly it is, especially if you are going to places that ferengi go but locals don’t.  You can get most places in Addis for around 40-100 Birr each way depending on how hard you negotiate.  If you tell the driver you want round-trip it is cheaper and they don’t mind waiting.  E.g. if you want to go to Island Breeze restaurant which is in the Piazza area near the old post office a driver might say 100 birr each way, but will happily accept 170 birr round trip including waiting for 2 hours while you eat.  Do not pay them anything until you have completed your return tripJ Our most frequent cab driver was named Marshahl and he waits at the cab stand by New York New York.

Drivers-We didn’t hire a driver until we’d been in Addis for about 5 weeks.  We walked or mini-bussed everywhere, or took an occasional cab.  If you want to get out of Addis though, a driver is best.  Also, if you want to go up Entoto Mountain, but sure to confirm your driver and their vehicle can make it up there as many can not!  Like cabs, negotiate a rate a head of time (usually a half-day or a whole day rate) and don’t pay anything until you are back home.  When we were in Addis, a half-day rate was approx. 300-500 birr and full day was 500-700+ depending on your negotiating and the driver.  You could get less, but the vehicle/driver was often not so great.  Most drivers have vans so if you chip in with friends you can have a pretty affordable outing. The driver we used mostly was named Melkamu.

For longer trips (like to Awassa) check-out sky bus which is an upscale bus option.  That’s what we were going to take if we went on our planned trip to Awassa and Aregash Lodge (which never happened due to delays by our agency that kept us in Addis far longer than necessary).

Money in Addis

Practical Travel Info: Money in Addis

It is quite easy to get money in Addis, but like everything else, there are some quirksJ

We have a Mastercard debit card and our bank does not issue Visa debit cards, so we knew that we were limited to only using Dashen Bank in Addis.  If you have a Visa debit then you have more options.  Fortunately, there are two Dashen Bank ATMs and an actual Dashen branch in the Getu building right up the street from the Weygoss.  Unfortunately, there are usually lines as everyone in Addis seems to prefer Dashen ATMs--they can be used with Mastercard or Visa, you don’t have to have a Dashen account to use them (you have to have an account with many of the banks in Addis in order to use their ATM machines), and they don’t charge extra fees.  More unfortunately, the ATM computer network has issues and individual machines frequently break-down or are out of service, so there is a pretty high likelihood (I’d say about 40%) that the ATM won’t be working.  The Dashen ATM on the outside of Getu seems to work better than the one on the inside of Getu.  There are several more Dashen ATMs around Addis, including at the Hilton and the Sheraton. ATMs dispense 100 birr bills.

We tried not to let our birr completely run down, but sometimes it did.  We brought about $400 US in $20 bills as our emergency stash for the 9+ weeks we were in Addis and are so glad we did!  You can change money at most banks, the Hilton, and occasionally in very small amounts at the Weygoss front desk in a pinch—we had to do this several times!

With the exception of our guesthouse bill, we operated on a cash-only basis in Addis.

Laundry at the Weygoss is quite expensive but was the best price we could find.  It was exponentially higher at the various laundry/dry cleaners we visited in person.  Having one week’s worth of clothes washed (keep in mind we wore everything at least twice and often more and B was pretty neat and had no intestinal issues or accidentsJ) was about 400 Birr.

We budgeted $170/week for food, water, laundry, and internet as well as $50/week for transportation and $25/week for souvenirs.  Our estimates were pretty accurate. We under spent on drivers and over spent on souvenirs it was basically a wash in the end J

***Be careful walking around with large sums of money (US or Birr) as pickpockets are rampant. Especially watch for the kids with boxes (of gum, tissues, whatever) they will use that as a ruse to pick your pocket.  We were never pick pocketed, but we often surprised kids by pulling their hands out of our pockets.  Many of our fellow guests who were not quite so street smart/observant were pickpocketed.  We kept our USD in a belt we bought for Ababa (looks like a regular leather belt, but has an interior zipper where you can put folded money) and in my wallet which was inside our diaper bag which was inside our backpack which had the zippers locked with a small combination lock***

Eating in Addis

Practical Travel Info: Food in Addis

There is a lot of delicious food in Addis.  The restaurants are mostly inexpensive by western standards and we did not ever get seriously sick (we had travelers diarreah for the first couple weeks but I don’t think that was directly food related and then were totally fine with a few small exceptions noted below).   The three of us usually ate for 160-240 Birr ($10-$15 US) per lunch or dinner—including drinks, tax, and tip.  There is not a difference in lunch and dinner prices in Addis.  Bills usually include a 15% VAT tax and a 5-15% service charge.  Check the menu see if those are included in the price or if they are tacked on at the end as it can be a nasty surpriseJ.  It is nice to leave a small additional tip, but not mandatory.  We usually left between 10 and 20 birr tip (around 10%).  Diners in Addis like to linger, so be sure to ask for your bill when they clear your dishes if you don’t want to spend another hour sitting at the table. Many restaurants have high chairs, but B usually sat on our laps or in his own chair.  The “green peppers” typically used in Ethiopian cooking are more like jalapenos, so don’t expect American bell peppers. 

As far as our reviews of restaurants, it’s probably important to know that I am a long-time vegetarian who now also eats fish, Ababa loves meat, and B has a fairly severe egg allergy.

Water-We bought water in 5 liter jugs from Ethio Super Market right down the street from the Weygoss.  Prices fluctuated between 16 and 19.50 birr per jug. That was consistently the best deal we found on water and was definitely the most convenient.

Food Shopping-We went to Shoa Supermarket which caters to westerners and has clean produce (walkable distance from the Weygoss).  Shoa has amazing cinnamon rolls (though they don’t ave them often).  Also, they have good french butter.  The Ethiopian butter we found had a not so pleasant grassy/sheepy taste and smell…We also shopped at Ethio and at New York New York market (right up the street from the Weygoss).  Produce at the big Coke bottle by the Bethsaida Higher Clinic (walking distance, just past NY NY market) was also supposed to be good and bananas were 9 birr a bunch.  Dry pasta was usually around 22 Birr per pack, Ramen was about 8 Birr per pack, teddy graham-type snacks were 24 Birr per bag, candy bars were about 12 Birr, and juice was about 35 Birr. Our friends also shopped at Bambis (which unexpectedly closed while we were there) and Savemore which are further away (you would need to take a cab).

Restaurants-Ice Blue and Makush deliver to the Weygoss.  Of the two we strongly preferred Makush, but it was way overpriced for mediocre food. Our go-to restaurants were Ricos (Italian and traditional food, right up the street from the Weygoss) and Sangam (Indian, right down the street from the Weygoss).

Ice Blue-Our favorite dishes were their traditional dishes we had gomen besiga (spinach and meat), shiro (spiced vegetarian pea puree), assa wat (fish stew), and tibs wat (meat stew) and liked them all though they were quite greasy/oily.  The wats are very spicy though!  Of their other dishes, they have an extensive menu of western dishes and everything we ordered off of it ranged from edible (pasta capagnola and chicken stir fry) to absolutely revolting and the worst thing we ever ate (lasagna).  The penne alfredo tastes ok if you don’t think at all about alfredo—it is mushy penne with canned peas and a clumpy oily oniony sauce.  By about week 2 we decided to only order traditional food, pasta capagnola, chicken stir fry, and fruit juices from Ice Blue.  We know people who also really like their fresh fruit salad. DO NOT GET THEIR LASAGNA!  It tastes like burnt cigarettes, herbs, and moldy cheese. 

Makush-The food at Makush is decent Italian food and all orders come with these really yummy thimble-sized rolls.  I had the spaghetti with cream and mushrooms the first time we ordered from there and it was delish—creamy, garlicky, fresh mushroomy, yummy.  Every other time it was a severe disappointment--bland, no garlic, weird tang. canned mushrooms, etc.   The fish is so over cooked it’s pretty hard, but the steak with mustard sauce (I think it’s called Kandisinsky on the menu) is yummy.  Ababa’s stomach felt kind of iffy after his Gallery Burger (he said the flavor was good, but lots of mayo and it had a bunch of random veggies on it—carrots, cabbage, etc), but he didn’t get sick.  Our standard dinner order for the three of us was 1 pasta, steak, or fish dish, 1 order of meat sambusas, 1 mixed salad no olives, and 1 vegetable soup (this tasted slightly different every time but was always good except for one night when the soup was clearly spoiled!).  The salad was delish.  I ate it many times and never got sick.  Avoid the veggie spring rolls, they do not taste good.  The lasagna is okay but greasy.  They have a dessert menu and their chocolate mousse is pretty good—that’s the only dessert item we triedJ

Ricos-We found Ricos our 3^rd or 4^th week in Addis and it literally changed our lives.  They don’t deliver, but they do take-away, it is very close to the Weygoss, the prices are good, the portions are huge, and the food is great.  We always had take-away after a meal at Ricos to give to someone on the street (with some birr stuck in the bag—it’s the easiest way to give money to beggars without getting mobbed!).  We tried every fish dish on the menu, they are all great, our fave is the cajun fish with mashed potato instead of fries.  Ababa loved the Mendi (roasted lamb, saffron rice dotted with French fries and veggies, meat chili, and chapatti).  B and I usually got a fish dish (our fave was Cajun fish) or the Veggie Fiesta Pizza to share, with orange juice to drink.  Ricos has by far the best pizza in Addis. HANDS DOWN, NO COMPETITION. Sometimes it needs a little salt or a dash of their awesome green chili sauce, but the cheese is good and not funky, the crust isn’t like cardboard, the sauce is yummy, and there’s often garlic and fresh oregano.  Dishes are made slightly differently each day (e.g. sometimes the veggie pizza has cabbage, carrots, and zucchini and sometimes mushrooms, garlic, fresh oregano, zucchini, onions, and peppers), but it always tastes goodJ The staff are awesome and would remember what we liked from the previous visit and bring a small cup and extra straw for B to share my juice, green chili sauce for me, a small plate for B, etc.  We ate at Ricos at least once almost everyday and during the almost 4 weeks when I was really sick with a horrible sinus infection, we sometimes had lunch AND dinner there! We ate green salad, caprese salad, and fruit salad at Ricos and did not get sick.  The veggie salads are cabbage-based, rather than lettuce and I did not care for the optional red sauce on the fruit salad, but the fruit was good. Their mashed potatos are delish and you can also get a side of veggies (usually cabbage, carrots, and zuchinni) with a dish for like 5 birr. They start each meal with a complementary cup of bland creamy veggie soup and bread (white and whole wheat).  On the weekends they skip soup and have a salad bar. We never ate the salad bar though.  We could get 1 pizza to feed all three of us for about 50 birr plus tax on days when our budget felt tight.  FYI-The kids pizza is no smaller than the regular pizza, it just has a thinner crust—great for days when you aren’t so hungry and still definitely enough for 1 adult and 1 child, or maybe even 2 adults. WE LOVE RICOS!

Sangam-If Ricos was our standby starting the 3^rd or 4^th week, Sangam got us through the first few weeks! It is REALLY delicious Indian food and a very short walk from the Weygoss.  The atmosphere is nice, the waitstaff are kind and helpful, and I can’t stress enough how yummy their Indian food is!  Everything we tried was good, though the curries and other dishes could get pretty spicy.  Especially look out for the dark red peppers in the eggplant dish on the vegetarian thali, they are really really hot and are hard to see b/c they look like eggplant skin at first glance. Our standard order was veggie samosas, raita, yellow dal, plain rice, plain nann, and a dish for Ababa (his faves were Chicken Tikka, Lamb Saagwala, Fish Tikka, or Butter Chicken). Or we’d get a Thali with a separate dish for Ababa. The chairs are also a little higher than most, so B could easily sit on a chair and eat rather than on one of our laps.  The first few weeks I may or may not have said that as long as we could eat at Sangam I would make it through our stay in AddisJ  We ate raita which had fresh veggies and yogurt and never got sick.  I couldn’t finish my plain sweet lassi the one time I got it though b/c it tasted really tangy—not like greek yogurt, more like liquid feta cheeseL

New York New York-Just up the street past Ricos, New York New York is a large restaurant and there is a small supermarket and other business in the complex as well as a hotel under construction.  Ababa loved their Beef Shwarma and their Shiro is delicious (ask for it without egg though as they serve it with a hard boiled egg).  B and I liked the juices, especially the avocado juice, and were ok with some of the vegetable rice dishes as well as the grilled fish with rice and veggies, but the food’s not that great, it’s more expensive than Ricos, the pizza is the worst we tried in AddisL, the service is very slow, and it gets very loud, crowed, and night clubby.  Unless you are craving Shwarma or Shiro, just go to RicosJ 

Cloud 9-We ate here our first night in Addis.  Ababa liked his roast chicken, but my ravioli were so salty they were inedible. They have a dance floor/night club thing going on in the evenings.

Africa Queens-This is up the road a little from the Weygoss.  It’s a German/Swiss restaurant.  We only ate here once.  The ambiance was nice, food was yummy but not quite what we expected. We liked it, but never went back.  It was a little too far, a little to expensive, and a little not nearly as good as RicosJ Closed Sundays.

Zebra Grill-This is in the Debesta building up the road from the Weygoss.  We went here once and had jerk fish with masala chips and jerk  beef with rice and a lentil samosa.  The food was okay but not great (though some of the other food smelled delicious!).  The restaurant is nice though b/c it has gorgeous big fish tanks with tropical fish and offers amazing views of Addis.  B loved it and yelled “fish” for most of dinner.

Kaldis Coffee-Many families live here during their time in ET.  Since neither of us really like coffee and we don’t go to Starbucks much in the US, we were not those people. It’s very walkable, but a bit of a trek with a 2 year old from the Weygoss.  We ate here a few times.  The vegetable sambusas, avocado juice, and strawberry juice were yummy.  Ababa felt a little iffy after his chicken sandwich (which had hard boiled eggs AND mayo on it) but he didn’t get sick.

Metro Pizza-Up even further than Kaldi’s, we went to Metro Pizza twice b/c some friends thought it was the best pizza in town.  Not so much.  It’s better than Ice Blue, NY NY, or even Makush, but no where near as good as Ricos, plus it’s a pretty far walk from the Weygoss—I think about a mile.  The pasta dish we got was good but had a hint of cinnamon in the tomato sauce and the noodles seemed like Ramen.***a note about Pizza in Addis.  Many places have interesting views on “American pizza” and when combined with fasting from meat on many days by religious people in Ethiopia and the prevalence of tuna on menus, you can get some pretty weird combinations like “American pizza” having tuna, capers, raisins, zucchini, and olives!***

Shisu-Hands down the best food we had in Addis (though Ricos and Sangam were vying for a close second).  Sishu is currently located near the big Ethiopian National Bank and the National Theater which is an easy trek from the Weygoss via two mini buses or a cab, or a very long but do-able walk for adults.  Shisu serves a delicious but limited menu of burgers, fries, and other American-style food, as well as brunch on Sundays.  The food here is not “Great for Addis” it is great for anywhere!  The bacon cheeseburger is in Ababa’s top five of all-time and their incredible hot chocolate (made with milk, cream, cocoa, homemade vanilla extract, cinnamon, and citrus zest is the best I’ve had in my life! We tried to go to Shisu once a week after our friends introduced us to it around week 3.  We ate salads here no problem.  B LOVED the tuna salad “American style” and I tried a different vegetarian sandwich each visit and loved them all!  In the basement is a great children’s play area with hammock, swings, a giant papermache castle and boats, etc. B was scared of it all, but other kids LOVED it.  Closed Mondays., but on other days open until 8 pm

Island Breeze-This is in the Piazza area across from the old post office.  It’s very American style food-onion rings, pizza, burgers, potato skins.  The food is yummy, the salsa is AWESOME, and it’s safe to eat the raw veggies.  I loved the salsa and the taco salad made with fish instead of beef.  Ababa loved the food here, but he and B both did get some tummy issues after eating the chicken wings. We only went twice b/c we needed to take a cab to get there and the food was nowhere near as good as Sishus.

Aladdin-The most expensive meal we ate in Addis!  Aladdin is a middle eastern restaurant in the friendship area (turn down the road with the sign for the Japanese embassy and it is on your left).  It’s pretty and the food was delish (I recommend the falafel and tabuli, YUM!!!) but it was crazy expensive compared to the other restaurants we went to (our meal was over 400 birr) and it was a very long walk (we took a mini bus down Bole) so we only went once.  But the falafel and tabuli were really amazing!

Lime Tree-We went to Limetree twice and weren’t big fans.  It’s the big expat hang out.  We thought the prices were very high, the food not that good, and it’s the only place I got sick after eating salad.  The lime and ginger iced tea and hummus were delicious though!!!

China Bar-YUK!  It’s in Meskel square and was the second most expensive meal we had.  The décor is very 1950s “Chinese” and they have chop suey on the menu.  The egg rolls and fried rice were weird but edible. The devil’s soup is nasty and the rest of our meal wasn’t great.  The people next to us got something on a sizzling iron skillet that smelled really good, but we had no desire to ever go back.

Lucy Café-Located next door to the National Museum, Lucy Café has cuisine that is very similar (but not as good) as our beloved RicosJ  My pineapple juice was fermented so I didn’t drink it.  It’s convenient if you are at the museum, but otherwise, the prices are about 20-30 birr per dish higher than Ricos and the food is definitely not as flavorful.

Traditional restaurant with dancing- we planned to go to Habesha 2000, Faskika, and Yod Abysinnia, but we never got there...

La Parisienne-Located on Meskel Flower Road just before Demble City Center.  Delicious breakfast.  Buttery brioche and croissants and awesome French toast.  We didn’t get around to visiting here until week 8, but would have gone much more frequently if we’d started earlier!  We got fasting brioche or fasting croissant for B (no egg in them) and then I loved their cheese croissants (savory like a mild grilled cheese sandwich).  Their juices and teas are good.  Hot chocolate is just ok.

Castelli’s-supposed to be the best restaurant in Addis.  We never got there though...

Hilton-We visited the Hilton for a friend’s birthday party and liked the fish kebabs with rice and veggies off the kids menu.  It was yummy and not super expensive (I think 50 birr).

Smoothie Delight (near Shoa Supermarket, on opposite side of street)-YUM!  Fresh fruit smoothies and ice cream.  Our friends loved the ice cream, but we stuck to the all fruit smoothies (you can have them made with milk or OJ).  Delicious and we didn’t get sick.  Our friends ate there almost every dayJ

If you are only in Addis for a week for court or Embassy, we strongly recommend Ricos, Sangam, and Shisu, as well as Makush or traditional food from Ice Blue if you need delivery. (edited to add: I think I got sick from Ice Blue traditional Shiro on our last night in ET).

Housing in Addis

Practical Travel Info: Housing in Addis

We stayed at the Weygoss Guest House for our 12+ week stay in Addis.  We picked the Weygoss due to it’s:

·      Convenient location (right off of a safe area of Bole Road, within walking distance of many restaurants—two of which deliver to the guest house, minibus routes, cab stands, and shopping buildings). This was far and away the best selling point for the Weygoss and the biggest reason we stayed there.  I cannot stress how much of a difference this makes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

·      Large room options (We originally had a Master Suite--2 rooms, 2 baths, and a private kitchen, but realized our first night that we only needed the Jr. Suite--large room with private bath in the hall and shared access to the kitchen with one other room.  The Master Suite is great if you are bringing older kids with you too).

·      Clean—we had no issues with bed bugs, fleas, or other non-mosquito bugs—even when a group of travelers who had fleas from their previous adventures moved into our floor (some other guests did get a couple bites, but we didn’t).

·      Competitive prices—the published prices are quite high, but we negotiated a rate that was significantly lower.

·      Recommendation of two other families who had stayed for 7 and 12 weeks respectively.

·      Outdoor space—common brick paved courtyard, common roofdeck, common lobby, hallways that could be played in when necessary, and a small private balcony off our room.  Especially during rainy season, we wanted outdoor options that would not be super muddy (e.g. paved courtyard was more attractive to us than a garden during this season)

·      Quiet and Safe-Typically, the Weygoss was very quite, felt extremely safe, and and was warm and welcoming

·      The other guests—we met some amazing people who were adopting, traveling, doing humanitarian work, or just visiting Addis. Most guests were adoptive families from Canada and some from the US.

Overall we enjoyed our stay, but there were several things we didn’t like so much.  Some of it is just life in Addis and some is unique to the WeygossJ

·      The staff was very friendly and helpful but in Ethiopian culture it is perfectly acceptable for strangers to walk up to you, take your child and hug them, walk with them, effusively kiss them, etc.  When someone feels they know your child (has seen them on several occasions) this is even more pronounced.  It is a warm and loving gesture, but for adopted kids who are processing their new family and for families who are trying to begin the bonding process with their child, it is not so beneficial.  Many of the Weygoss staff were very enthusiastic in their attempts to hug, hold, kiss, and interact with our child.  As a guesthouse that caters to adoptive families, it would be great to see staff have a better understanding of and sensitivity towards these issues.

o   Two particular staff we had strong reactions to were an aggressive cleaning lady who would literally take B out of our arms, try to shoo us away, turn him from us, and tell him he was hers/going home with her/did he want to go turn on the lights (one of his favorite activities…etc).  We spent much time trying to figure out how to avoid her as she completely ignored our protestations and attempts to firmly keep B in our arms. By contrast, Sintohta, the man who operates the gate to the courtyard during the day was amazing.  He was attentive to our son, but would gently redirect him to us, tell him we were his parents in Amharic, and do subtle things like if we were all “playing soccer” (as much as a 2 year old plays soccerJ) if he thought B was kicking the ball to him too much or not checking-in with us he’d kick the ball to B and say “kick to mama” or “kick to daddy”.  He was amazing and helped us a lot the first few weeks when B had some daddy confusion.

·      Weygoss includes complimentary breakfast—pancakes (which are thin crepes served with honey or syrup depending on what they have), scrambled eggs (which have peppers, onion, and tomato), and omelet (which was the same as scrambled eggs, but almost deep fried), or oatmeal.  They also had bread, jam, coffee, tea with cinnamon, and hot water available as part of breakfast.  At the end of the first week we realized B had a pretty serious allergy to eggs so we fed him plain oatmeal in our room.  We couldn’t eat plain scrambled eggs as he would develop a rash if just the oils touched him but we could eat pancakes if we washed our hands and mouths afterwards.  On average, the Weygoss did not have pancake batter at least 3 days per week so the complimentary breakfast wasn’t as valuable to our family as it could have been.

·      Internet-The Weygoss charges 30 birr per hour for wireless internet and 75 cents Birr for using their computer for internet.  The internet is very slow, went out frequently, and was entirely unavailable for over 2 weeks during our stay.  We ended up borrowing a mobile hotspot (EVDO stick) from a family who was leaving and our internet experience was MUCH better.  I would HIGHLY recommend buying a hotspot if you will be in ET longer than a month.  You can buy them in ET for about $150 US and then have to pay a monthly fee and load Birr onto it to use, but it is so worth it.  The two weeks that we had no internet access were very difficult and we almost missed some important correspondence from our agency.

·      Kitchen-The “fully equipped private kitchen” the Weygoss advertised is actually a sink, a dorm-sized fridge, and a hotplate that rests on the floor (our hotplate would give us a mild electrical shock each time we used it).  We also had 2 mugs, 2 cups, 2 forks/knifes/spoons, one thin pot that was basically made of aluminum foil, and one small metal tea kettle.  When we saw the kitchen, the price of groceries at the stores that cater to Westerners, and how affordable restaurants were, we ate out for almost all our lunches and dinners. If you plan to cook, bring a good multi-purpose pot and perhaps a few cooking utensils and a good knife.  These can be purchased in Addis but the quality is low and the price is about the same as Western prices, or higher.

·      Bathroom-Our bathroom was in the hall not en suite (which we knew, the smaller second room that we gave up had an en suite and most of the rooms here are en suite). Hot water was great and pretty reliable and the water pressure was awesome for Ethiopia, but the bathroom had a lot of mold and was quite dark so it felt kind of yucky.

·      Open Air Concept-The Weygoss is built around a central staircase that is open to the outdoors at the bottom.  During most of the year this provides breezes and ventilation (there is no heating or AC in most buildings in Addis, including the Weygoss). The only issue is that stray cats sometimes wander in at night and mate, fight, and dig through trash.  Not ideal, especially when your bathroom is not en suite!  This was only an issue the nights we stayed up, mostly we went to bed at 7:30 with B and slept through it all.

·      Rain-We were there during rainy season, but during the drought so the rainy season was much less severe than usual.  Our windows leaked significantly, so most mornings we would wake up with a 6 inch wide stream of water running from the corner of the window to under the bed. The Weygoss is trying to fix this.

·      The other guests—we had one group of particularly annoying travelers, an expedition from Canada Humanitarian who was rude, loud at all hours of the night, used our kitchen (including to wash their flea infested clothes), “borrowed” dishes from our and others’ kitchens, and were in general unpleasant.  Also, there were some kind of sketchy “business” travelers from various parts of Africa and the Middle East who seemed to enjoy the services of prostitutes on several occasions, monopolized the front desk staff, and continually tuned all of the TV satellites to all-Arab channels. In general though, the other guests were really nice and we met some amazing friends.

·      Cab from airport-Arrange your own.  The cab the Weygoss arranged for us cost an exorbitant amount ($10 US for a very short ride) and then the cab driver demanded an extra $5 for our luggage AND he let the unscrupulous airport porters load our luggage and told us we had to pay them too.  We had been traveling for 24 hours were jet lagged beyond belief, it was 11pm in Addis and very dark, and he was very pushy.  We didn’t feel very safe, so we paid.  All told, the ride cost us over $20 US. The Weygoss should protect their guests better than this if they are arranging the ride from the airport. (More on this in the transportation postJ)

·      Maintenance-They Weygoss did “maintenance” for about 3 weeks when we were there.  It was actually quite large and loud construction projects, namely knocking holes in all room’s ceilings, replastering, and then installing decorative molding.  It was loud, dusty, and not so pleasant for the few guests who were there during that time.

Despite this seemingly long list of issuesJ we did enjoy our stay at the Weygoss, would definitely consider staying there again, and would recommend it.  If you have bigger kids, the 4^th floor rooms actually connect and the roof deck is right outside your room, but the bathroom only has a shower, no bathtub.  The mastersuites on the second floor have a partial wood door that actually separates the entire suite from the hallway so that you have more privacy.   The location of the Weygoss is great and I cannot emphasize enough how much money and aggravation you save being able to walk almost everywhere you want to go!!!  The owners are open to suggestions, and were also willing to negotiate the rate a little lower midway through my stay due to the issues I mentioned above. Stay tuned for more details on our favorite restaurants, many of which are walkable from the WeygossJ

Weygoss Bathroom (the best one IMO-ours was a lot worse)

Weygoss Kitchen-All utensils, tubs, and kettle provided by tenants, there's also a dorm sized fridge

Practical Travel Info

Blog Post Series: Practical Travel Info

I will try to post weekly travel posts from during our time in Addis, but I know when we were planning our trip one of the best resources for travel info was other families’ blogs, so I am going to start with a series of posts on practical travel info. I imagine these would also be helpful for adoptive families in other countries and who travel during different times of the year, but please note we were in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and we traveled from the end of June until the end of September 2011 to adopt our now almost 3 year old son B.

A very helpful guide we took with us was the Addis International School’s Guide for New Teachers HERE; however, as we learned, some of the items in here were not quite correct, like the International Evangelical Church Service times are only 9:30 and 11:15 (took 3 weeks of being late to church to figure that out:-).  I’ll try to note big differences in my descriptions.

This little series will include:

Housing in Addis

Food and Eating in Addis

Money in Addis

Transportation in Addis

Internet and Phone in Addis

Maybe someday I'll get around to entering and linking these:-)

Medical Care-in an emergency, the Swedish Clinic and Korean Hospital are great

Packing List

Shopping (practical and souvenirs)

Things to Do

Day Trips

Guess who leaves in 5 days?!?!?!?!

Our shots are done, only two more oral typhoid vaccine tablets to take, bags are packed (full of donations of formula, diapers--cloth and disposable, and shoes), hopefully our visas will be processed this week, and we are racing to finish our big projects (me--work and school, Ababa--the kitchen and various other projects around the apartment).  We had a wonderful "toddler shower" on Saturday and enjoyed spending time with our friends and B's future BFFs:-)  We had our official travel call with our agency this morning, and we can't believe the time is almost here!

I leave Saturday and Ababa next Tuesday (don't get any ideas about breaking into our place as we have someone staying there while we are gone, and our friends will be keeping an eye on it as well:-)

Please pray that B's aunt's court date goes smoothly tomorrow and that she has peace about her decision, that our MOWA letter is written before we travel for court, and that our travel and court date goes smoothly.  Most of all, please pray for B (and for us) that our hearts are open and we can begin this journey of becoming a family!

Human pin cushions:-)

We got our travel vaccines today, including yellow fever, polio booster, and typhoid (oral vaccine), plus a tentanus booster and a Hep A shot for me.  Feeling kind of yucky, but trying to power through!

One week from tomorrow is my last day in the office until the end of September.

I have no idea how we are going to get everything done at work, home, and school before then, but somehow it will work out.

A huge thank-you in advance to all our friends and family who are helping whether through watching woosha while we're gone, being so kind to throw us a "toddler shower" to celebrate, being patient when I am stuck at work until all hours of the night instead of keeping to our original plans, etc. THANKYOU!

Addis Projects

Well, this weekend is Memorial Day and that was my goal to stay peaceful and not start obsessing about getting a court date.  I am still doing pretty well, but I think it's taking most of my concentration to concentrate on work and school.  When I sit down to type my brain just keeps going, "when is our court date...will we pass this summer...will it be in July...will it be after I am back from Russia...will it work with Ababa's class schedule in the fall...will we pass the first time...how long will it be between court and embassy...." So, this weekend I'm going to post some awesome videos of ET and cool projects in my neighborhood and of course, the story of Vilele....

But, for today...

Korah video

The City of Addis Documentary

A Walk to Beautiful short

Super craptastic day...

Well, after several hours in the auto-phone system and on email with USCIS it seems that our I-171H is not close to being issued...every prospective adoptive parent I have talked to in the past 3-4 months has gotten their I-171H within about 2 weeks after fingerprinting.  Apparently not us...

We are now well into 3 weeks and no sign of our I-171H so I reached out to USCIS.  After a bunch of run arounds for a receipt number that was not on our fingerprinting receipts, we learned that our case has still not been assigned to a case worker and that USCIS is estimating 75 days from receipt of I-1600A to processing (and approx. 30 days from receipt to be assigned a case worker).

The first reps I spoke to online said the number we had couldn't be tracked in the online system and was being processed by the local center, but I was under the impression that all I-600A applications were being processed through the central processing center.

Also, our receipt number starts with SIM (which the caseworker on email said all of their case receipts start with) but the USCIS site it specifically says: The 13-character application receipt number can be found on application notices you have received from the USCIS.  It begins with three letters such as (EAC, WAC, LIN, or SRC).  When I called the first few times they specifically said only those letters were what could begin the receipt number. Our receipt number with SIM doesn't work in the online system either...


Shocker, there seems to be an issue here...I wish that USCIS could get their story straight and get our I-171H issued ASAP!

We are at 40 days from receipt of our application and no sign of a case worker...

Sigh...!  We could really use a good break right now!!!

B-we love you and are trying to bring you home as soon as possible!

Where is Ethiopia Anyway?

If your geography is as sketchy as mine, you might need a refresher:-) We have to finish our autobiographies tonight so we can get our policy documents submitted this weekend. So, here's today's contribution...a mini geography lesson.

Ethiopia is a landlocked country (Eritrea, Djibuti, and Somalia keep it from having any ports.)  Ethiopia used to have an agreement with Eritrea to use the port city of Assab; however, the border disputes of the late 1990s and early 2000s ended those discussions and agreements.) 

Tell me about Ethiopia...

Ethiopia is a beautiful country with a rich cultural history, that includes being the home of the Queen of Sheba and being the only African nation that was never colonized. It is a culture that values its children and family connections and is one of only a few places where people of the Christian, Jewish, and Islamic faiths live together peacefully; however, today Ethiopia is struggling.  It has been ravaged by famine, the AIDS epidemic, and abject poverty.

- One in ten children die before their first birthday.

- One in six children die before their fifth birthday.

-44% of the population is under 15 years old.

- 60% of the children in Ethiopia are stunted by malnutrition.

-The median age in Ethiopia is 17.8 years old.

-1.5 million people are infected with AIDS (6th highest in the world).

-There are roughly 4.6 million orphans in Ethiopia.

-Per capita, Ethiopia receives less aid than any other country in Africa

-Half of the children in Ethiopia will never attend school

-Ethiopia’s doctor to child ratio is 1 to 24,000

Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows. Isaiah 1:17

Why Adopt from Ethiopia?

We choose Ethiopian adoption after much thought and prayer.  


Top five reasons we chose Ethiopia

1. We feel strongly and inexplicably called to adopt and want to offer a child/children the love and stability that a family provides.
2. We feel best suited to adopting and dealing with the needs of an infant, toddler, or young sibling group. We explored adopting through the US fostercare system first, but learned through that system that we would most likely be adopting older children, many with significant issues.  We may pursue that route at a later time when we are more experienced parents, but do not feel equipped to meet the unique needs of an older child at this time.  Adopting through Ethiopia we can limit our parameters to infants, toddlers, and young sibling groups.
3. Ethiopia has a tremendous need and we fit the requirements for marriage length, health, and finances stipulated for Ethiopian adoption.
4. Ethiopia offers a relatively affordable, straightforward, and ethical adoption process. 
5. If we are blessed to also get pregnant during the adoption process, we have the option to put our adoption paperwork on hold and resume after the baby is 6 months or older.  If we have already received a referral for a specific child Ethiopian laws and our agency offer some flexibility to continue with the adoption, which would be our desire.

We understand that issues in Ethiopia are far larger than can be addressed with the current adoption system; however, through adoption we can change the life of a child/children.  One of the really cool things about adoption is that it raises your awareness of pressing issues, softens your heart, and calls you to action.  And it doesn't tend to be just you! Whole communities of families, friends, and colleagues become aware of issues and seek to help.  Maybe adoption isn't for you...but sponsoring and praying for a child...or a well...or a school...or an NGO...might be.  Meaningful, large-scale change can happen and God can use our individual actions to work amazing change!